Do you ever feel like you are waiting for that next thing to happen, but you don’t know what that thing is? Are you restless? Bored? Unsure of where to place your energy? Feel like everyone else is moving forward, while you are stuck, frozen in place, not sure of how or when or where to make that first step towards something? Anything? Well, if you answered yes to any of these questions, then…
Welcome to my party!
Now, to be clear, this is not a pity party, nor is it a party where we will have all the answers on how to get unstuck. It is just a simple party. Just a “HOORAY! I AM NOT ALONE IN THIS PHASE OF LIFE!” party. So kick back, grab your favorite party snack and drink, and join the fun!
You see, I believe that I’m not alone in the way I’ve been feeling. I also know there are many reasons why I feel the way I do, most of them valid, just as you have reasons to feel the way you do. We may even share some of the same reasons. In my case, I think I am accustomed to change every few years or so. First, it’s school, then work, then marriage, then career, then moving (which means job change and new friends), then baby, then moving again (job change, new friends), then another baby, then another job and more new friends, then another move, then not working, then starting and maintaining a business. This last endeavor began nine years ago and continues today. Our last move was thirteen years ago, the longest I have ever lived in one place since graduating from high school.
The most recent big change in my life was our son going away to college this past year. All the changes I mentioned prior to this last one required a lot of my time and energy, and in many ways, were exciting, often scary, and sometimes sad. Life was very busy for all of my years leading up to now. This last change actually freed up time for me. My daughter, being a socially active teenager, and my husband, traveling for work, gives me more time to myself as well. Is this a blessing or a curse?
I would like to fill this newly found me-time with meaningful and productive purpose, but I feel a bit paralyzed. It’s the same feeling I have in art class when given a blank acrylic board to add whatever paint colors and textured materials I want. I stand there staring at the palette of colors, half expecting the “good” ones to wave their pigments at me and yell “Pick me! Pick me!” Of course, that’s not going to happen. I just have to dive in and pick colors and create designs that I think will make me happy. If the first design doesn’t make me happy, I have to try new colors and textures until I feel satisfied with my creation (which I still don’t after several weeks of the class).
I guess filling my life with satisfaction is similar to producing a work of art that might create joy. I will have to try a number of different things to find what works for me. It’s not just lack of change or having a little extra time that creates this restlessness. Now that our kids are older and less dependent on us, many of my friends have found new interests, new careers, or they’ve moved away. As happy as I am for them, I feel somewhat left behind, through no fault of theirs, of course. The timing just doesn’t coincide for all of us.
So, here’s a toast…
To each one of us who feels stuck, or restless, or bored… you’re not alone! These feelings must be trying to tell us something… Perhaps we are on the cusp of change, transitioning toward something that is just out of reach. Maybe it’s time to keep our eyes and ears open for new opportunities… to experiment and try new things… to go beyond our comfort zones. However, as I am learning, we must be patient. It may take some time. But I believe that we will each find our own way to create our own joy.
Let’s get this party started!
Thank you for joining me!
Until next time,
Red Barn Artworks... A small company with a big passion to create meaningful art from everyday photos.